Held Even in the Forgetting

There is a specific cruelty in the middle of the night when you wake for a split second and forget. For one breath, the world is whole again.

The person is still here. The pain has not happened yet.

Then the memory crashes back in like a wave, and you realize you are alone in the dark. You feel the weight of the loss all over again, as if it just occurred.

Jesus knew this feeling — the soul overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death, asking if there was another way. He did not skip the grief.

He fell on his face in the dirt and felt the full crush of it. But notice what happens after the crushing: he stands up.

He walks into the morning. The light does not promise you won't wake up forgetting.

It promises that when the reality returns, you will not be swallowed by it. The sorrow is real, but it is not the end of your story.

You are held even in the forgetting.