the panic of realizing you have forgotten the specific texture of their hand in yours, forcing you to stare at your own palm trying to ghost the feeling of their grip

Held When You Cannot Feel

The panic rises when you realize the specific texture of their hand has faded from your memory. You stare at your own palm, desperate to ghost the feeling of their grip, but your skin feels hollow.

The darkness tries to convince you that if the touch is gone, the love is gone too. But listen — the light does not rely on your ability to recall.

It relies on its ability to remain. The absence of the sensation is not the absence of the presence.

You are holding onto air, yes. But you are also being held by something that never lets go.

The grip you cannot feel right now is still there, steady beneath the panic. You do not need to remember the touch to be safe in the hand.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, John

Verses

John 10:27-28

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