lying perfectly still in bed so your partner doesn't feel you trembling after they ask if you're okay and you say you're fine

The Dawn Does Not Wait For Stillness

The morning light is gray against the curtain, and you are holding your breath so the person beside you won't feel the shake in your ribs. They asked if you were okay, and you said yes, because the word 'fine' is easier than the truth.

But the light does not need you to be still. It does not require you to stop trembling before it can reach you.

There is light within a person of light, and it shines even when you are pretending to be stone. The dawn is not waiting for your performance to end; it is already here, spilling into the room, touching the parts of you that are terrified.

You do not have to carry the weight of the mask into this new day. The sun rises on the evil and the good, on the shaking and the still, without distinction.

Put the armor down. The day has begun, and you are allowed to be exactly as you are.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, Matthew

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