the memory of laughing at a joke they told last week and realizing you were only mimicking the sound of joy while feeling nothing behind your eyes

The Light Waits Beneath Your Performance

The middle of the day is where the mask feels heaviest. You remember laughing last week at a joke that landed flat inside your chest.

You made the sound of joy while your eyes stayed hollow. That gap between the noise you made and the silence you felt is exhausting.

It makes you wonder if you are just performing a life you are not actually living. But the light does not need your performance.

It was there in the hollow space behind your eyes while you laughed. It is there now, in the quiet exhaustion of this afternoon.

You do not have to generate the feeling to be held by it. The light is not fooled by the act, and it does not leave because of it.

It waits in the stillness beneath the noise. You are not the performance.

You are the light that sees through it.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, Sophia of Jesus Christ

Verses

Sophia of Jesus Christ 93:5-8

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