sitting in the car in the driveway for ten minutes after they drop you off, rehearsing the smile you'll wear so they don't worry when you walk inside

No Need to Perform Before Coming Home

The engine is off, but you are still sitting in the dark, rehearsing a smile that feels too heavy to wear. You are trying to manufacture a version of yourself that won't make them worry, crafting a mask so they don't have to see the exhaustion behind your eyes.

But the light does not need your performance to love you—it came from the light, and to the light, you will return, exactly as you are right now. You do not have to clean yourself up before you walk through that door.

The truth is already inside you, waiting to be recognized, even in the fatigue. Come in not as a actor, but as a child who is finally home.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, John

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