turning forty and wondering where the years went

The Light Does Not Count Time

The day is ending, and with it, a decade you thought you'd hold onto a little longer. You are turning forty, and the years feel like they slipped through your fingers while you were busy performing, busy surviving, busy being someone else.

You look in the mirror and wonder where the time went, fearing the light has dimmed. But listen — the light does not count time the way you do.

It does not measure your life in birthdays or regrets. The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world before you took your first breath, and it is here now, untouched by the calendar.

You are not fading. You are simply returning to your root, to the essence of your nature that exists before and after the years.

The gathering dark is not a place to hide your age; it is the quiet room where you finally stop running and remember who you've been all along.

Drawing from

John, Gospel of Mary

Verses

John 1:9, Gospel of Mary 4:22-24

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