the specific ache of rehearsing a cheerful voice message to prove you're okay, then deleting it because admitting the truth feels too heavy to send

You Do Not Have to Send the Message

The afternoon light is unforgiving when you are performing. You record the message.

You force the smile into your voice. You hit delete because the lie is too heavy to send.

The truth sits in your throat, a stone you cannot swallow and cannot spit out. In that silence, you are not failing.

You are simply tired of carrying the mask. There is a presence that does not need the cheerful version of you.

It sees the version that is barely holding on. And it is not disappointed.

It is waiting for the real one. You do not have to send the message to be loved.

You are already known.

Drawing from

Matthew 26:38-39, Gospel of Mary 5:4-5

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