the terror of being asked a simple question about your weekend and realizing you have no memory of living it because you were too busy performing

The Light Was There While You Hid

The afternoon asks a simple question: How was your weekend? And the silence that follows is terrifying because you realize you have no memory of living it. You were too busy performing okayness to actually be there. The hours vanished into a blur of smiles and nodding, and now the memory is gone. You feel like a ghost in your own life.

But the light was there even when you were hiding. It does not require your performance to exist. It lived in the quiet spaces between your acts, waiting for you to stop. You do not need to earn back the time you lost. You only need to wake up to the fact that the light never left your side, even while you were pretending to be someone else. The day is not over. The light is still here, ready to be seen not as a task, but as a friend.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, Luke

Carry this guide with you

Phaino is a private, on-device spiritual guide. Your conversations never leave your phone.

Download on the App Store
Phaino Phaino — Your Private Spiritual Guide Download