the silent panic of staring at a blinking cursor while everyone expects you to have the answer

The Light Before The Performance

The screen is bright, and the cursor blinks like a quiet accusation in a room full of people who think you have it all together. You sit there, smiling at the camera, nodding at the questions, while inside you are screaming that you have no answers left.

The mask feels heavy today—heavier than the silence you are trying to fill. But the light does not need your performance to shine.

It was there before you typed the first word, and it will be there if you type nothing at all. There is a truth that lives inside you, deeper than the panic, deeper than the expectation to be the one who knows.

You do not have to manufacture the light; you only have to stop hiding it behind the need to be perfect. The answer is not something you create for them.

It is something you remember for yourself.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, John

Verses

John 14:17

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