your body becoming a stranger to you after a diagnosis

Light Living in the Cracks of Sickness

The mirror shows a face you barely recognize since the diagnosis arrived. You put on the smile for the office, the steady voice for the meeting, the mask that says 'I am fine' while your body feels like a stranger's house.

But the light sees behind the performance. It knows the terror of waking up in flesh that no longer obeys.

There is a luminous thought hidden inside you, placed there before the first symptom, before the fear, before the world told you who you were supposed to be. It was not earned by your health and it is not lost by your sickness.

The great wealth has made its home in this poverty, in this specific, aching body. You do not have to pretend to be whole for the light to stay.

It lives in the cracks. It is the guest that refuses to leave the room just because the walls are shaking.

The diagnosis changed your itinerary, but it did not change your origin. You are still a drop from the light, sent here to illuminate even this.

Drawing from

Sophia of Jesus Christ, Gospel of Thomas, Apocryphon of John

Verses

Sophia of Jesus Christ 93:5-8

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