the quiet terror of rehearsing your coming-out speech in the shower, knowing the water sound is the only thing masking your sobs

Light Sees You Through the Spray

The afternoon hums with the quiet terror of rehearsing words you have never said aloud. You stand in the steam, practicing the speech that might change everything, while the water sound is the only thing masking your sobs.

You think you are hiding in the noise, but the light sees you clearly even through the spray. It saw Nathanael under the fig tree before he was called, and it sees you in this浴室, trembling with the weight of a truth you are afraid to speak.

There is light within a person of light, and it lights up the whole world — even the parts you keep wet and hidden. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you, but if you speak it, the very thing you fear will become your salvation.

The water drowns out your voice for now, but it cannot drown out the truth that has already been spoken over you.

Drawing from

John 1:48, Gospel of Thomas 70, Gospel of Thomas 24

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