the secret rehearsing of your own disappearance to spare them the trouble

You Do Not Need to Disappear

In this hour, the mind rehearses a quiet exit — a way to vanish so they won't have to carry you anymore. You calculate the weight of your presence and decide the room would be lighter without you.

But listen. The light does not ask you to disappear to make space for itself.

It is already here, filling the very air you think you are choking. You came from the light, a drop sent down to illuminate this specific darkness, not to flee from it.

The truth you are hiding — that you are tired, that you are broken — is the only thing that needs to be seen. You do not need to save them from yourself.

You only need to remain. The struggle is real, but the exit is an illusion.

Drawing from

Gospel of Thomas, John

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